Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
