Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Success! We fucked roommates!
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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