I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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