It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Randomize
