I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
