yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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