the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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