people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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