Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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