nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
