ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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