therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
