what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
