I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
He better not be in your backpack
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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