you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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