Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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