So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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