I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize