We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Randomize