Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Congratulations! We have a period
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