oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
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After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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