I'm really into asian looking animals
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
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