My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
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