Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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