Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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