do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
