sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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