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• (719): View more from Colorado

  okay pat passed out under dana's car

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• (585): View more from New York

  She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.

  (585): View more from New York

  Aren't divorce parties fun?

  (1-585): View more from New York

  You and I have very different definitions of fun.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."

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  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong

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• (845): View more from New York

  we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'

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• (862): View more from New Jersey

  Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.

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• (310): View more from California

  I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.

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• 

  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will

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• (619): View more from California

  I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.

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• (951): View more from California

  What's dad's email?

  (1-951): View more from California

  askmom@cause.idk

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• (940): View more from Texas

  It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Yes.

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