WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
