I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
