I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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