I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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