I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
