gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
