I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Is Oprah even human
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
