yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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