remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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