My pussy is not your playground.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
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