proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize