Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
ttyl tear gas
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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