you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
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