your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize