I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
