You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
