How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I believe in your delicious
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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