how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
