I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
you will always have a special place in my vag
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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