cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Still dying that you shit outside
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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