I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
