whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
